I have Pandora (John Hiatt radio streaming) for company. Am doing this and that, knocking around, way too late to be up, but content to be finishing laundry, putting up dishes, drinking a little wine and making a little tiny bit of headway into the chaos that is my new home. I am calm and quiet. I don't get these moments often.
I am running a little bit. My knee is swollen and stiff, but it doesn't hurt. I use pain as my bellweather. I have no pain, so I will continue to do baby runs. Every single one is a gift. The MRI says I am bone on bone in my right knee. I don't hurt, and I am sure not telling her about it, but I make myself take stock now and again. Well, maybe more than now and again. I am pain free when I run. But in my daily life I am really stiff with limited range of motion in my right knee. I know, a new consult is in order. I know. But tonight nothing hurts, and I can bend down and pick stuff up. I take it where I can get it.
I took Small People to Disney after school yesterday. Smallest of all, now that she has conquered her fear of small roller-coasters had a high-hankering to ride the Thunder Mountain etc coaster. So much fun to hear the screams and laughter on the ride. Small one wanted to ride Space Mountain. 2 hour line. Intense ride. She loved it, but didn't like the headache she had afterwards (from her head knocking around -- mine too). I think Space Mountain will be a good memory for us. We will willingly give up our spots in line for the next space travelers.
I have started doing Zumba. I know. I know. Cult, not running , cult, not running. Not real exercise, cult, not running.
It is fun. No, it isn't just fun. It is really, really fun. I have terminal white person disease, so I can't dance like everyone else, but I still have a whole lot of fun. I kind of look forward to the class. My life is one of those that has no cushion. We live hard-core all the time. We just do. My kids don't ask for the newest and the best, they don't ever ask for the latest and the greatest, for the next new thing. We don't live that way.
Every other Saturday, we can Zumba. Badly, of course, but that isn't the point. Small People can get in there and dance, and pop, and well, dance as best they can. And they can do it next to me, or in front or me, or waaaay in front of me. They can't follow the instructor for crud. But they try and they have fun and they work. It counts. It counts.
I am trying to make a good life happen for us. It is just me making a life for them. The only thing I can so is try.
So I stream Pandora...John Hiatt. It helps me. It calms me, and therefore it lets me help them. It is easy to be clear-thinking when I am calm and quiet.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Crush of the week.
I have a new one, which is always a good thing, because it means people are stepping up to the task at hand in a big way.
My hospital, recently, lost it's heart surgeons. We had two cardio-thoracic-vascular surgeons (both of them really good) up and decamp to another hospital. They left for lots of reasons, major dinero being first and foremost. Anyway, after a nation-wide search, we have, as of the beginning of the year, two new surgeons. Now, we just had to deal with the vascular butcher last summer -- the doc (lower case) who caused complete mayhem. Understandably, all of us, from the CVOR, to SICU, to CVTU, were apprehensive. Well, maybe a little more than that. Our ARNP was feeling out of the loop. The anxiety in the staff was palpable.
January, 2011. Dr D has assumed CVT responsibility, all of it. Dr W is out of the game for a bit, because he broke one of his fingers. Everyone knows the story behind it, and it endears him to us all. Sight unseen. It is that kind of story. Dr D makes a point of rounding and meeting all the nurses -- all million of us. It has got to be overwhelming, but he is gracious, and seems kind, calm and caring. And he talks, really talks, to his patients. That is huge. It doesn't hurt that when he writes orders his last is always, "Thank you kindly". He is the kind of Doc that nurses will go the extra, extra mile for. That doesn't happen often.
But, my crush of the week goes to Dr W. He actually told an under 50 year old, 2 pack a day smoker, 12-pack+ a day drinker that he wasn't going to operate on the patient's heart. The blockages weren't critical, and maybe lifestyle modification was in order. He re-consulted cardiology for medical management. CRUSH.OF.THE.WEEK. You don't take your meds (all of which, but plavix, on the $4 pharmacy list) but you continue to smoke and excessively drink, and you end up with yet another heart attack. Bypass is your last option. It takes a strong, confident doc to put the patient's problems back on the patient. Lifestyle modification. Hard to do, but necessary for the future in successful heart bypass. The message: We will fix you, but you have to invest in yourself first. Do your homework and we will do our part.
One instance of our tax dollars not being mis-spent.
Crush of the week. (and Dr W calls me by name, so he gets extra points.) I thought our CVTU program was going to take a major hit. I was wrong. We had a very small speed bump. I expect great things going forward.
And, because this is first and foremost a running blog: I ran 5 miles yesterday and 4 miles today. First runs since I decided to move to a new house. It isn't much, but it counts. I am sore, but my knee isn't complaining. I have DWD to get ready for and a Monkey to run. I take the little bits where I can get them.
My hospital, recently, lost it's heart surgeons. We had two cardio-thoracic-vascular surgeons (both of them really good) up and decamp to another hospital. They left for lots of reasons, major dinero being first and foremost. Anyway, after a nation-wide search, we have, as of the beginning of the year, two new surgeons. Now, we just had to deal with the vascular butcher last summer -- the doc (lower case) who caused complete mayhem. Understandably, all of us, from the CVOR, to SICU, to CVTU, were apprehensive. Well, maybe a little more than that. Our ARNP was feeling out of the loop. The anxiety in the staff was palpable.
January, 2011. Dr D has assumed CVT responsibility, all of it. Dr W is out of the game for a bit, because he broke one of his fingers. Everyone knows the story behind it, and it endears him to us all. Sight unseen. It is that kind of story. Dr D makes a point of rounding and meeting all the nurses -- all million of us. It has got to be overwhelming, but he is gracious, and seems kind, calm and caring. And he talks, really talks, to his patients. That is huge. It doesn't hurt that when he writes orders his last is always, "Thank you kindly". He is the kind of Doc that nurses will go the extra, extra mile for. That doesn't happen often.
But, my crush of the week goes to Dr W. He actually told an under 50 year old, 2 pack a day smoker, 12-pack+ a day drinker that he wasn't going to operate on the patient's heart. The blockages weren't critical, and maybe lifestyle modification was in order. He re-consulted cardiology for medical management. CRUSH.OF.THE.WEEK. You don't take your meds (all of which, but plavix, on the $4 pharmacy list) but you continue to smoke and excessively drink, and you end up with yet another heart attack. Bypass is your last option. It takes a strong, confident doc to put the patient's problems back on the patient. Lifestyle modification. Hard to do, but necessary for the future in successful heart bypass. The message: We will fix you, but you have to invest in yourself first. Do your homework and we will do our part.
One instance of our tax dollars not being mis-spent.
Crush of the week. (and Dr W calls me by name, so he gets extra points.) I thought our CVTU program was going to take a major hit. I was wrong. We had a very small speed bump. I expect great things going forward.
And, because this is first and foremost a running blog: I ran 5 miles yesterday and 4 miles today. First runs since I decided to move to a new house. It isn't much, but it counts. I am sore, but my knee isn't complaining. I have DWD to get ready for and a Monkey to run. I take the little bits where I can get them.
Monday, March 21, 2011
I have a Crush
I have a friend on a running site who designated the "Crush of the Week". I now have one. Dr D., a hospitalist of the female persuasion, internal medicine on-call. Crush. Of. The. Week. (Maybe the MONTH. Or longer. It depends on who else steps up.)
Malingering. It means what it says. Docs shy away from saying it, because our society is so stupidly litigious. Nurses, not so much. Nurses don't get sued so easily, therefore we can call a spade a spade. We see patients all the time who love being sick for sake of being sick. Some people just like being in the hospital. They love the attention, and can go on forever about all their ailments, real or perceived. They know the buzzwords, they know the system, they take real dollars and real health-care away from people who really need those services.
I had a patient that no one would get rid of. NOTHING was wrong with this man, outside of his normal state of health. He just kept saying the right words, therefore the docs kept working him up for things that weren't wrong with him. Malingering. Walking the halls, hounding the nurses, being inappropriate with other patients, taking advantage of the nursing assistants. Everyone knew that he was fine, but no doc would stand up to him. Lawsuits, you know. Malpractice -- the driving force behind healthcare.
Anyway, Dr. D walks in and discharges the guy (with no narcotics). 8 hours later, after much drama (yelling, crying, wailing, begging, berating) he finally leaves. We send out surveys so that patients can tell us how good of a job they think we did. I don't think that Dr. D will fare very well.
Crush. Of. The. Week.
Malingering. It means what it says. Docs shy away from saying it, because our society is so stupidly litigious. Nurses, not so much. Nurses don't get sued so easily, therefore we can call a spade a spade. We see patients all the time who love being sick for sake of being sick. Some people just like being in the hospital. They love the attention, and can go on forever about all their ailments, real or perceived. They know the buzzwords, they know the system, they take real dollars and real health-care away from people who really need those services.
I had a patient that no one would get rid of. NOTHING was wrong with this man, outside of his normal state of health. He just kept saying the right words, therefore the docs kept working him up for things that weren't wrong with him. Malingering. Walking the halls, hounding the nurses, being inappropriate with other patients, taking advantage of the nursing assistants. Everyone knew that he was fine, but no doc would stand up to him. Lawsuits, you know. Malpractice -- the driving force behind healthcare.
Anyway, Dr. D walks in and discharges the guy (with no narcotics). 8 hours later, after much drama (yelling, crying, wailing, begging, berating) he finally leaves. We send out surveys so that patients can tell us how good of a job they think we did. I don't think that Dr. D will fare very well.
Crush. Of. The. Week.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Monday night meltdown.
The single Mother, Runner, Nurse thing is hard. Lately it is harder still, as I am making progress in our lives and buying a house. I have a 7 year old and a 9 year old to help me. Off and on, when his classes permit, I have a 19 year old to help. Mostly, though, I have me.
How can I complain about buying a house that will be a home for my little family? How can I complain about making a place that will be a touchstone for all of my children? How can I complain about being able to afford such a luxury? How can I complain about providing us a home and maybe, (Good Lord willing and the water don't rise) a dog for my Small People. How can I complain?
I can't. I am blessed. I know that. I am just tired, and worried, and stressed. I have to do this all by myself. The mortgage, the closing, the painting, the flooring, the moving...it is all on me. I am good with it. But, wow. It all has to be done soon. And I have to do it. It really sucks that the guy I was spending time with chose to walk away right now because I am unappreciative. The loss of support is huge, but I am going to make it anyway.
How can I complain about buying a house that will be a home for my little family? How can I complain about making a place that will be a touchstone for all of my children? How can I complain about being able to afford such a luxury? How can I complain about providing us a home and maybe, (Good Lord willing and the water don't rise) a dog for my Small People. How can I complain?
I can't. I am blessed. I know that. I am just tired, and worried, and stressed. I have to do this all by myself. The mortgage, the closing, the painting, the flooring, the moving...it is all on me. I am good with it. But, wow. It all has to be done soon. And I have to do it. It really sucks that the guy I was spending time with chose to walk away right now because I am unappreciative. The loss of support is huge, but I am going to make it anyway.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Super Bowl Sunday --messy post
I ran today, outside, for the first time in a long while. Not a good run, but who am I, anymore, to say what a good run is? I finished. I ran outside. As of 10:15 pm, I am still walking. So, a BIG checkmark in the win column.
I love pro football. I just do. And, as a single mom who loves football, I am passing this on to my small people because rooting for and being invested in the home team is important. It grounds you. It gives you roots. It gives you a reason to connect to the city/town.
I am trying to give my small ones the best parts of me. I am teaching them to cook. ( I can make something out of nothing. Give me a few staples and some castoff stuff in the fridge, and I can make something you will want to eat again. Except that you can't, because I don't keep track of what I do.) Not really a recipe kind of girl, here. I am trying to pass that on to the small people. Katie can, carefully--under close supervision-- chop things. She cannot mince herbs, but she is killer with carrots, peppers, parsnips and the like. She knows how to saute, but still needs some help with the strength of her utensil. She is only 9, after all...her hands are only so big. But she is learning to turn meat and veggies, and to take them off heat at the right time. WIN!!!
The best part of the Super Bowl is the party. Today our party was just the 3 of us, but we had a loud TV, lots of football and snacks. The snacks were really good, but the commercials? Ummm.
Fajitas and fish tacos at half-time (yeah...dinner for the next week) were wonderful. Katie helped. And Small People thought the Black-eyed Peas half-time show was really cool, too. All in all, a Super day. It may be only us, but our "us" is all sorts of fabulous.
I love pro football. I just do. And, as a single mom who loves football, I am passing this on to my small people because rooting for and being invested in the home team is important. It grounds you. It gives you roots. It gives you a reason to connect to the city/town.
I am trying to give my small ones the best parts of me. I am teaching them to cook. ( I can make something out of nothing. Give me a few staples and some castoff stuff in the fridge, and I can make something you will want to eat again. Except that you can't, because I don't keep track of what I do.) Not really a recipe kind of girl, here. I am trying to pass that on to the small people. Katie can, carefully--under close supervision-- chop things. She cannot mince herbs, but she is killer with carrots, peppers, parsnips and the like. She knows how to saute, but still needs some help with the strength of her utensil. She is only 9, after all...her hands are only so big. But she is learning to turn meat and veggies, and to take them off heat at the right time. WIN!!!
The best part of the Super Bowl is the party. Today our party was just the 3 of us, but we had a loud TV, lots of football and snacks. The snacks were really good, but the commercials? Ummm.
Fajitas and fish tacos at half-time (yeah...dinner for the next week) were wonderful. Katie helped. And Small People thought the Black-eyed Peas half-time show was really cool, too. All in all, a Super day. It may be only us, but our "us" is all sorts of fabulous.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
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