Emotional miles.

It never, ever bodes well for a long run, when, the evening before said long run, you see the guy you have been keeping company with for a couple of months leaving an apt complex where a nurse who is also a "good friend" lives. Combine that with no answers to txts for hours prior to this, no calls back from voicemail. All of which are really abnormal. And then his first txt back is "sorry, I was visiting , meeting her new cat (please, can we get a better euphemism???), and I had the sound turned off on phone." Are you kidding me??? That phone is your crackberry...it is on 24-7.

So, even though I am JUST keeping company with him (meaning tons of talking and txting and all that other stuff -- yeah, that, too --) I had a hard night. And to be brutally honest, even though I knew I was going to run the longest that I have run in eons, I had a liquid supper of the chardonnay kind. Lots of calls to friends for support. I love my friends. But nutrition-wise? Not a good idea. When you are running 16 miles in the morning, you have to prepare. Seriously, you have to feed the machine that is going to propel you forward. I know this. Really, I do. I know lots of things. I just have to remember to know them. Sometimes knowing and remembering gets lost in all the sad stuff. It just does.

So, 16+ today. I did it. I made it. I was PAINFULLY aware of my nutritional deficits. I was nauseated from 12-15....all because I was just too empty. I had to walk now and again because there just was no fuel in the tank at all. I was burning glycogen, not good carbs. I know better than that. I do. And it ticked me off that I know better and didn't take care of that because I was all emotional about a guy. Again. Upset, worried, confused about a guy. It has to stop. Like Johnny Depp said in Alice in Wonderland, I have "lost much of my muchness". I intend to find that "muchness". And not only will I find it, I will live it. And I will pass it along to my small people, so that they have a full compliment of muchness. People of the female sort need a lot of muchness.

I ran just under 17 miles today. I have 10 weeks to Bayshore. I will, without a doubt, make the distance. Even if I have to crawl. I have that much "muchness" in me.

Total: 16.5+ miles
Total for week: 37 miles or so